Culture Clash

As I sit down to write, I am having a hard time processing all of the things I want to write about. Though it feels like there should be a thousand new things to say, life here is starting to feel a tiny bit "normal", so that doesn't necessarily lend itself to blogging.

I'll start with saying we have had a few experiences that made me think "there is no way this would happen in Chicago." The first one happened on our way to Tel Aviv last week. As we were leaving our apartment, we decided to take a moment to explore the building we are living in. We thought that behind the building there was a shared courtyard for all of the inhabitants of the building to use, and when we moved in, we had specifically asked our landlord if this was the case. She had said yes, so we decided to open the gate on the side of the building (literally three feet from our entrance) and look in the backyard. The gate was unlocked, as we expected, so we walked to in to take a look. We saw a small yard, and the entrance to an apartment on the right. Suddenly, a loud alarm went off! We looked at each other and walked back out the gate, unsure of what to do--Should we call someone? Wait for something to happen? Run away?  As we were standing there feeling helpless, a woman came out of the apartment door screaming, "Whats going on? What are you doing here?!" We stood there apologizing profusely, explaining that we had just moved in, and thought this was a shared courtyard. The woman was not amused, and clearly very upset. I can understand her surprise, but we were very apologetic and had made an honest mistake. She told us, "Your story doesn't add up! Didn't you see my gate? Why would you come in to my private property?!" She spoke very clear English, so this was definitely not a language issue, but she still didn't want to hear our apologies. Finally she went inside, and Adam and I felt terrible--we have to live under this woman all year, and she thinks we are thieves! We called or landlord to explain, and she ended up talking to our disgruntled neighbor. It turns our there was a misunderstanding of where the "shared courtyard" was, and there really isn't one. Oops. Now every time I come home I cross my fingers that I won't see her again!
 I think if this had happened at home, the neighbor may have been a lot more polite and willing to hear our story. Here, people are very much on the offensive, and are quick to yell. There is no time to explain yourself, and everything automatically goes to yelling and accusations. For example, we went to the grocery store yesterday, and went to wait patiently in line, which is something I teach young children how to do quite often. There were two lines that were awkwardly merging to get to the cash register. In the States, if two lines are merging, people are generally cordial and try to accommodate one another. You might hear, "Oh you go ahead." "No you go", "I insist! Have a great day!"Not here. Unfortunately my language skills are not good enough to truly understand the brawl that happened as these two lines tried to get to the register, but I think it went something like this:

Woman A: You were not here! Wait your turn, lady!
Woman B: Oh no no no I have been here the whole time! I am going first!
Woman C: Seriously?! No No no I was here first. get out of my way, bitches!
Man: Let (Woman A) her go first! We have all been waiting for so long! Just go! Go!
Everyone in line" YELL YELL YELL BLAH BLAH BLAH! Angry Yelling!!!"
** Another  line opens next to this one. A and B rush to get there first. Woman A puts her things down on the conveyor belt.  Woman B picks them up and put them behind her own things.***
Woman A: No! NO No NO! I was here first what is wrong with you!? Don't touch my stuff! How dare you!?
Woman B: How dare YOU?! (Other woman reaches for her things, she grabs her hand up and moves it out of the way)
This went on for about five more minutes, until they were done yelling and seemed ready to go on with the day as if nothing interesting had happened. Basically, it was any episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey. The best part was, it ended with "Shabbat Shalom! being yelled passive aggressively as they left. I think I have some toughening up to do!

On a more lighthearted note, we have had a wonderful Shabbat! Last night we met some friends for services at Kol Haneshama, a progressive congregation just down the road. The service was all music, and many tunes that I could sing along to. The bast part was that it felt as though every single person in the congregation was singing. Everyone knew the words, and sang with true ruach (spirit). Afterward, we went to dinner at a new friends home, and shared discussions and spirited conversation with other HUC students. I have a feeling there will be a lot of spirited discussions at the Shabbat table over the next year!

Today we were invited for Shabbat lunch at the apartment of a Rabbi who is here for the summer. He is a graduate of HUC, and works in Peoria, Illinois. AS we sat around the table, each of the 10 HUC students and spouses had a chance to tell their story, and how they ended up here. It was a great way to get to know people on a more personal level.

I am excited that tomorrow I am going to the Gan (Kindergarten) at HUC to do some volunteering. There aren't any academic programs in the summer, but I am excited to feel useful and productive. Adam starts orientation on Monday, so I'm sure there will be more tell by next week!

Well, I guess I did have stuff to write about! If you guys have any questions or things you thin might be interesting to write about, let me know--I don't want to run out of steam.

Shabbat Shalom!!

Melissa